Disappearing Act

September was a few months back, and since the step-aside, I've been quiet, reflective, thoughtful, thankful, and sometimes struggling with what happens next.

It really felt as if that last month of the title year was flying by and a part of me wanted to just finish the ride, disembark, and quietly leave the amusement park for a relaxing hot tub...for a few months.
And then it was over. Done. There are now new shiny people, and they are wonderful and excited, and there's a lot of happiness for them and congratulations for you and life returns to normal.
But does it?
What is normal now?
Normal shifts because normal is what you become accustomed to doing. Normal is different for everybody, because it's part of your daily routine. So scouring social media for information becomes normal. Responding to emails from pups and trainers and interested parties becomes normal. Planning your next trip, airline bookings, transportation arrangements on both ends of a trip, booking hotels or arranging hosts, unpacking suitcases, doing laundry packing suitcases and planning wardrobes, thank you notes, long range and short term plans, planning time to spend with your partner, job searching, event planning, dodging drama, getting educated, writing classes, coordinating with mosh organizers to donate snacks because some of the most common snacks will kill your puppy (honey allergy), and I'm sure a dozen more things I've forgotten - all that became normal.
And that stopped. So now it's time to recapture the old normal, and that's not so easy.

Please note: I am not complaining or whining. I (sorta) knew what I was signing up for when we ran. I do my best to be open and honest here, and there's challenges along with the fun.

This was a once-in-a-lifetime journey and I will always treasure the wonderful experiences we had and the amazing friends we made. One year is great. I cannot imagine how people can manage a regional title year first and then an international circuit title year. But I took on a new load of responsibility and that became my life for a year. It becomes the new normal. And while I sometimes yearned for the old normal to return, when it did, it was not as much fun.

I spent many many weekends away from my partner. We don't live together, so we had to find time during the week - date nights, so to speak. Our former routine was Friday afternoon through Sunday night - we were together. We went to movies, out to bars, dinners together and with friends, and that was the old normal. We spent a good chunk of the last year learning to not be together on weekends, and the ones we did have, I just wanted to be lumpy and together and quiet while he wanted to go out and socialize. Now we have those weekends back, and I feel a struggle to fill the time. The new normal was to be gone and busy with events planned by others, and now that's done. The new normal was we learned to be apart on weekends (and weekdays) and now we have to un-learn that.

In the last year, I learned how to approach almost anyone and strike up a conversation, and hold that conversation for at least a few minutes. I learned how to engage people better, to open up my own life and learn about theirs. Even the ones I find really hot. That was hard! My historical behavior around people I find attractive tended to be sidelong glances, awkward approaches, and stunning opening lines like "I like beans.......<doh!>" I've gotten better. I found that I like meeting new people and seeing new places and sharing my experiences with whoever will listen to me jabber or read a blog.

That is not happening much these days, and it hit me really hard this last weekend as many of my friends made their way to Washington, DC for the Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend and I stayed home. Did I want to go? Oh yes. Could I afford to go? Not right now. So I went about my back-to-normal life and (not-so-very) quietly pouted about missing my friends.

So what's next? That's the big question. I'm still figuring that out, four months down the line. I've kept busy, and I'll backfill this blog, but it weird to redefine normal once again.
But while I ponder, plan, and dream, you are all in my thoughts.
And until our paths cross for the first time or the twentieth, I leave you with this..

ILSb/ICBB Weekend

The International Leather Sir/boy contest and the International Community BootBlack contest weekend was held in Dallas, Texas, on August 30-31. Yep, they're crazy. And a few hundred crazy people packed their formal leathers and joined them in the air conditioning inside and the 109 degree heat outside. I love all these crazy people - they're my family.

We flew in on Friday and (eventually) made it to the hotel. Yep, I screwed up on setting up a ride, but it was an honest and well-intentioned screw up. Luckey and I shared a room with our friends Tank and Lizzie, the current Mr and Ms Atlanta Eagle titleholders. Luckey, Tank, and I arrived about the same time at the hotel and got everything squared away at the front desk, got our keys, and headed up. Lizzie arrived the night before and had the whole night in the room to herself. I suspect it was her favorite night, lol. Then Daddy and two puppies arrived. The kitty had carefully unpacked and stacked her luggage before we arrived. Then the puppies rolled in and ESPLODED in the room. I was lucky to get a drawer and a place to stash my suitcase. So yes, we determined that puppies ESPLODE all over a hotel room. Two puppies do not double the esplosion - it goes up exponentially. Ask anybody who rooms with one. And as word got out which room we were in, puppies began arriving to bark out a HELLO. Unfortunately, we were right next to a conference/class room, and all the barking disturbed the Sirs & boys Roundtable discussion - Sorry about that, Sir John!

The contest started on Friday night with a blessing from the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence that was tailored to the occasion - very well done. Then it got down to business. The producers introduced a new format to keep things lively - they mixed hotwear, fantasy, and speeches into a constant stream instead of grouping them together. It was new and fun, and kept the pace moving. Afterwards, most people headed for the shuttle to the Dallas Eagle, but I knew it was going to be a long weekend, so it was early bedtime for me.

Saturday was MOSH day, sponsored by the DFW Pups & Trainers. After a good breakfast, I set out to visit the Vendor Market and get ready for the mosh. What a fun time! We had quiet pups and rowdy pups, gentle pups and rumble pups, leather pups and rubber pups, male and female bodied pups, and WE HAD FUN! Well done, DFW Pups & Trainers! You secured a safe area for the pups to play and set it up well. We did have a few runaway pups scurrying through the vendor mart and under tables, but fortunately nothing was broken or upended. We had a great deal of visibility as well, and a couple of friendly kitties stopped by to say Meow. Afterwards, I helped Rylee and Loki with the tear down and mat transport out to their vehicle - they were tired pups! It was great to get the time to visit with these fine young men who are heading up the DFW Pups & Trainers organization. After dinner at Joe's Crab Shack, it was time to get dressed up again for the second half of the contest. It was 109 degrees Fahrenheit outside, and unfortunately, the air conditioning was too overburdened to keep up on Saturday night in the ballroom. It was one hot night. The producers kept the same routine going and we heard speeches from the bootblacks and also from the hotwear/fantasy routines from the night before. Those who gave speeches the night before were in hotwear and fantasy routines tonight. Once again, it kept the audience on their toes. We were also blessed to hear Sir Jack, Boy Bamm-Bamm, and Ruin deliver their step-aside speeches. Made me cry... And, it ran long, as contests are wont to do. I met many of the contestants through the weekend, and I can honestly say I did not envy the judges their work. A strong field of men and women stood up and represented their communities well. In the end, Sir George took home the title of International LeatherSir 2013, Gattor went forward as the International Leatherboy 2013, and Paul proudly carried the International Community Bootblack 2013 title back to Seattle! Congratulations to everyone who represented their communities, and best wishes to the new titleholders! Off to the shuttle and the Eagle to celebrate! When that was done, I introduced Dominic, the Eastern Canada Leatherboy to a true delicacy - tamales - purchased from the nice lady outside the bar. These were exquisitely tasty, light, flavorful without being too spicy, and damn good at 1:30 am. I think they'd be good at 9am, noon, and 4pm as well. I tried to explain how to make them to Dom, but he just looked at me blankly. "Eastern Canada!" he says. "Just eat!" was my reply. He did, and we were happy.  Bedtime came late that night after long conversations. Sleepytime!

Sunday - oh, Sunday. How early you arrive. How bright your sunshine and how miserably hot you are. 109 again. There was an entire day of activities at the Dallas Eagle once again, and shuttles to get you there. I haven't sweated so much since I lived in Oklahoma. Bleagh. But the people were great and the drinks were strong - so we had a fun time. Dinner came at a place called Hunky's in the gayborhood, and we stopped to pay homage at JRs in our leather afterwards. A long night of fun lay ahead, but I could not bring myself to get dressed again. The heat and humidity cooked me - I do not do well in heat. My leather title vest was heavy and wet with sweat. eeew. So I stayed in, napped, and visited with Lizzie. She's an amazing woman, and I learned so much from her this weekend. I promise there will be at least one post that comes along later to address some of our discussion. Thank you, Lizzie, for sharing your life and your weekend with us!

Monday was an easy, lazy day. Tank and Lizzie left for the airport about 11, and Luckey arranged for our transport (so I couldn't screw it up). We spend the day with Lawna Jocqui and had a really fun time. Lunch at Hunky's again (yum!) and a trip to a HUGE underwear store in the gayborhood, followed by dessert at the Black Eyed Pea with some of his family. Good times! Then it was airport time, so he dropped us off at DFW. Thank you Lawna!

Waiting on the plane, my thoughts turned to IPTC 2013 and our return to Dallas in one short month. Luckey and I will sit on the judging panel and we will get to speak  our last time as the current International Puppy and Trainer before we pass the titles along to our successors. This has been an amazing year, and we're so thankful to everyone we've met along the way.

Great Job to all the good people who poured their time and their money and their sanity into moving this event to Dallas and making it a great time for everyone! I know it was hard work, and it paid off. Congratulations ILSb/ICBB team!

OKC Kink Weekend

Now we're off to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, to participate in the Kink Weekend OKC July 19-21! Yes, Oklahoma in July. The only worse thing is Texas in August, right? And yes - in leather. But we were totally excited to go see what our friend Nate Benner was up to as Mr. Oklahoma Leather. This was a kink education weekend at the (In)Famous Habana Inn in Oklahoma City. There were classes during the day on Saturday and a contest for Mr. Heartland Leather on Saturday night. Pup Loki joined Luckey and I for this trip - he flew with us to CLAW earlier in the year, and he wanted to go to the Kink Weekend. He was a great traveling companion and an easy pup to room with.

Friday night started off with a party, and what a fun time! These boys know how to throw a good one. This was extra special for me, because my sister lives in OKC, and she was able to join us at the bar for the opening night party and fetish ball. Hi Sis! She got to hang with us and watch people shoot each other with blowgun darts, hang weights from their scrotum, swallow swords, and snap mousetraps on all ten fingers at once. Good times. Then she declined to staple a $5 donation to the nice man's cheek or forehead, opting instead for his abdomen. I would have gone for the tongue or something lower, but I don't think he would have been so keen on ME abusing him, lol. We had a good visit and she's looking pretty darn amazing these days!

On Saturday Loki and I got up fairly early and caught breakfast at Braum's (amazing food) which was a short walk from the hotel. We knew this because we went there for dinner as soon as we arrived on Friday. Once fortified, Loki and I wandered over to the Vendor Mart (held in a church!) and then grabbed lunch for Luckey. He was up earlier than us because he was serving as a judge in the contest and interviews were EARLY! Like 9am! Post lunch, it was time for Puppy Boot Camp! Pup Hercules, Midwest Puppy, presented a class on wrestling moves. It was really nice to hear him teach and demonstrate his knowledge (don't scrap with him!) in an intimate setting. Then I presented Trainer 101 and had great class participation. At one point, the handlers were on the floor with the puppies getting a view they may not have experienced before. Then Sir Justin presented his Puppy 101 class, and we closed things out with a MOSH! Good times all around. It was good to hear Sir Justin present his class - I always learn from attending other classes. After a quick rest and some time in the pool, it was time to get some food and get dressed for the contest. Three brave men stood up and bared their hearts to the judges and their bodies to the crowd as the day progressed. Strong contenders all, the show was a pleasure to watch. Emcee's Lawna Jocqui and Alexandra StJames Gray, though they only met that day, were a powerhouse duo and kept the show entertaining and the audience engaged all night - great work ladies! In the end, as always, there can be only one Titleholder. I firmly believe that all three men are winners, because they stood up and presented themselves to their communities. The title of Mr. Heartland Leather was ultimately awarded to Michael, aka Pup Ryker, and I believe he will do well.

Ummm, did I mention the Hospitality Suite? Oooooh, the fun those four walls saw all weekend. The local community gave it 110% all weekend to support Nate and the event. They deserve a big round of applause for showing us all how to have a good time. I enjoyed a fantastic visit with Karri Plowman from Twin Cities Leather on Saturday night. What a great guy! If anybody gets up to Minneapolis, go to their shop and buy something!

Breakfast on Sunday was a bit sluggish - I'm not sure how many people actually slept since the contest. It was still loads of fun, but it was...calmer. As soon as we finished, Nate headed over to set up for a Shot Party fundraiser. Hmmmm, that was nothing but trouble too - but only the good kind.  As the afternoon passed, it was time to head back to Denver. Many thanks to Shae and Bradley for airport rides!

Thank you to everyone who planned, worked, attended, barked, howled, served, and participated in any way to this great event. This is one you should put on your calendar for next year!

We all got home safely and rested up from a long hot weekend in OKC - Next stop...hmmm. What is our next destination?

IML

Memorial Day, end of May. This trip was a lesson in patience; a walking meditation in keeping your eyes and heart open.

The universe set out a special set of lessons for us that weekend - many dealt with stress and patience. We had airline issues, baggage issues, hotel issues, relationship issues, time management issues, and more. What was the point? I believe it was to simply stay calm and keep working to move forward. This is not going to be a post to complain about everything that happened to give us stress, but I'm going to acknowledge that things happened, and ultimately, we made it through due to the kindness of our friends and strangers. Was it easy? No. There were moments that truly taxed my hypertension medication. And yet here I am, alive and healthy, a little wiser, and certainly grateful for general human kindness and helpfulness.

International Mr Leather weekend in Chicago is an experience like no other - you can make the weekend anything you want.
We wanted to have fun, reconnect with our friends and family from around the world, meet new people to add to our family, romp with the puppies at Woof Camp!, and enjoy the great opportunities Chicago has to offer. We got to do all those things.

So many of our friends that we've met this year are local or state or regional titleholders on their way to join the brotherhood of the IML competitors. It was wonderful to see them all and encourage them on their journey all year, and it was fantastic to watch them all through the weekend. It takes a special kind of courage to put yourself out there in one of the biggest competitions around. You should all be proud. Congratulations to Andy Cross, Mr. San Francisco Leather, for taking the International Mr. Leather title back home to the city by the bay and to Oil Tan Sam who took the International Mr Bootblack title home to Portland.

Many other friends are vendors at the various shows and events - it's been great to meet them and see how they pour their hearts into their wares. Support your local vendors, my friends. It may be cheaper to order merchandise from overseas, but the quality is superior here. You will get what you pay for. And if you have a problem, it's easier to deal with a human on the spot instead of a machine or service overseas. Support your local businesses!

Many of our friends do not fall under these categories. They are significant others, best friends, or community kinksters. They are wonderful supportive and loving people who make us feel at home no matter where the road takes us. They love puppies and all things puppy. We love them because they always welcome us into their lives and families anywhere we see them, and that makes our family bigger too.

There were so many conversations, so many hugs, meals shared, friendships formed, kindness shared, hot boys tied up, and good times - I could not begin to list them or even give highlights.

If you haven't figured out by now, let me make it clear - IML for me is all about my great big kinky leather family. I love them all, and I am honored to call them my friends and family. Hugs to you all!

Colorado Leather Weekend

Home at last after three weeks on the road! But not to rest - The Mr. Leather Colorado Foundation weekend of contests is here! During this first weekend of May, we select the new Mr. Leather Colorado, Mr. Colorado Rubber, and Colorado Bootblack titleholders.
I was honored to be able to judge this contest for the second year in a row, and I had the distinct honor of serving as head judge. Luckey served as one of two Talleymasters - the folks who collect the scores from each judge and do all the math and ultimately tell us who won.
Friday night started with a meet & greet at the Denver Wrangler. This is a chance for the contestants to interact with the public and the judges and show off their social skills. For the general public, it's a chance to socialize and meet the contestants. But for the judges - the game is on. We are watching everything the contestants do and how they do it. Social interactions are a major part of being a titleholder, and most of it occurs in a bar setting.
After the night slowed down, it was time to sleep and get ready for the contest on Saturday. Interviews started around 4pm, and we had three contestants for Mr. Leather Co, two contestants for Mr. Colorado Rubber, and one for Colorado Bootblack. The panel of judges were no pushovers - they were local and regional folks, most were titleholders, but all were experienced and had strong views of what kind of person they wanted to send forward to represent Colorado.
There were hard questions asked; emotions were high with some contestants, others were peaceful.
When it was all done, Lonnell took the title of Mr. Leather Colorado, Boy Paul will represent Mr. Colorado Rubber, and Boy Erik will serve as the Colorado Bootblack. Congratulations to all three of these fine men!
Sunday brought us back to the Denver Wrangler for a Victory Beer Bust, which served as both a party to celebrate the winners and a fundraiser towards their travel funds.
I want to thank the panel of judges - Michael, Dayton, Nate, Fox, Treasure, and Marty - it was a pleasure to work with all of you!
Thank you Rocky and Luckey - you kept us all on track and made sure our scores were legible.
And I want to thank the producers of the contest, the Mr. Leather Colorado Foundation, for the opportunity to serve on the panel and for their hard work every year.
There are some pics of the event here!
Now it's time to rest for a few weeks and pack for IML!

CLAW

It's the third weekend of April and we're heading east again, but northward to Cleveland for the ever-growing Cleveland Leather Awareness Weekend (CLAW). There was no contest during the weekend, but it was a puppy bonanza! Classes for an amazing variety of interests (including puppy) held in multiple locations, silent auctions rocked the nights, the vendor mart was large and the selections were wide. It takes an army of volunteers to keep this event running smoothly, and they did an amazing job.
One night offered a puppy obstacle course, complete with an MC to keep the crowd involved and the action moving. I volunteered to handle any pups without handlers so they could participate, because it was a team event. I was paired with a wonderful young pup whose handler/partner was busy volunteering and could not make the event. We had a chat about things and I learned that this was his first time as a puppy outside their house - big step for him! We talked about things and got comfortable with each other, and then he eased into headspace. Once we hit the floor of the agility course, he was ready and romping. He did a great job and we had a fun couple of minutes out in the middle of the room with a whole crowd watching. Later, his partner joined us and we had a friendly visit about how well he did. They were both proud, and they should be.
I was fortunate to spend some time with Boy Matt from New Jersey. This sexy man really helped me balance the needs of my introvert against the stress of the third weekend in a row traveling to larger events. I was worn a bit thin, and sharing time with him helped me recharge my batteries. Thank you Matt!
The second night offered a puppy mosh pit for the pups at CLAW. The attendance vastly outgrew the allocated space, long before it could begin. Wow. They were incredibly under-spaced. The mosh crew did their very best with what they had, and I was pleased that they were able to run and control the pit, but it was super crowded. Hopefully the event organizers will take note and triple or quadruple the space allocated before next year's event. Luckey did not join the mosh - it was impossible to control the snacks with such a large attendance, and his honey allergy makes him vulnerable to far too many things. So he stays alive for now, and we're ok with that.
We saw so many people, so many puppies, talked, visited, took photos, laughed, ate, and bonded. This really is an event that can be about anything you want it to be - so round up a group of your best dozen traveling friends and start planning to attend in 2014!

IMsL

From the warmth of the south to the chilly mornings in the city by the bay, three days later we arrived in beautiful San Francisco for the International Ms Leather and International Ms BootBlack contests. Our own local Colorado Bootblack, Foxfire Boots, was competing and we were there to cheer her along.
San Francisco is a wonderful city, and we walked our little legs off from the time we arrived until the time we left. Our friend Shazzy joined us for the weekend for a mini vacation and some shopping. Once we settled into our room, we set off on a mission - boots! Luckey needed a pair that fit him better, and my poor zip-side combat boots are showing their age. I was looking at Corcorans, and Luckey was looking to find something that fits well - he has lean calves, so fitting can be a challenge. Mr. S Leather was a great resource and we had lots of fun there, and followed on with a visit to Stomper's Boots. We finished our day with Shazzy ordering a custom pair of Wesco Boots for herself from Stomper's, Luckey finding a pair of oh-so-gently-used Wesco boots in Stomper's consignment section, and I found a pair of Corcorans at Mr. S. Success!
After a fantastic dinner, we joined our brothers and sisters at the host hotel for a Burlesque/Boylesque show - we had so much fun! There were amazing presentations, costumes, reveals, and people. As men, we were certainly in the minority at the event, and we were treated wonderfully by all the other attendees. There were classes, dungeon times, shopping, and so many wonderful people to socialize with that time flew by all weekend.
And yes - true to form - we ate. Blueberry pancakes in a wonderful diner, next to a tasty Indian restaurant just two blocks from the hotel - they got our business twice. Japanese/Sushi for lunch, tasty dinner -  we ate well.
I made the time to sit in on the public interviews for the bootblack title, and enjoyed that very much. Shazzy and Luckey had a blast with the corsets in the vendor mart, and she came home with three new ones. (It was buy two, get one free!) We enjoyed the contest for both nights, and were blown away by so many amazing speeches - I did not envy the judges their job to select only one!
When the scores were tallied, Sarha carried the International Ms Leather title forward to a new year, joined by Bella with the International Ms BootBlack title. Congratulations to them both!
And congratulations to each and every one of the brave individuals who stood up and were willing to put themselves on the line for the opportunity to represent their community. The experience is a learning time for each one, and not always the easiest weekend. It takes guts and heart to stand up, and each one of them should be proud of themselves.
With such fun and so many friends, and some of the best blueberry pancakes I've ever eaten, it was hard to leave San Francisco. But it was time to go home, do laundry, repack, and head out one more time...

Atlanta Leather Pride Weekend

Four events in four weekends in four different states - yep, we're crazy. But we kicked it off by heading to beautiful Atlanta, Georgia, for Atlanta Leather Pride Weekend and the Mr./Ms. Atlanta Eagle Contest.
We flew out of cold Colorado weather and landed in warm Georgia weather - a welcome change of pace! Our hosts for the event were our friends Jeff Donaldson and James Menge. Jeff is the outgoing Mr. Atlanta Eagle 2012 AND the current American Leatherman 2012. James is his wonderful partner - such a pair of darling men opened up their home to us. We did, of course, have to pay tribute and pet the dogs as much as possible - they do run the house, you know.
The good people of the Atlanta Leather community took us into their pack and we ran with them for the weekend. In those busy days, we visited the Atlanta Eagle many times, ate great food, drank so much sweet tea that our mothers got diabetes, met folks in person that had previously only been online friends, snuggled with as many people as possible, spent time with the Panthers Leather/Levi club, ate amazing homemade peach cobbler, made new friends, participated in a photo shoot for a fundraising calendar (stay tuned for details), watched an amazing contest, and had a wonderful time.
Congratulations to Pup Tank, Mr Atlanta Eagle 2013, and Lizzy, Ms Atlanta Eagle 2013, and best of luck to them in their title year.
We were met with such warmth and kindness that it warmed our hearts all the way back to frigid Colorado.  Our flight home was delayed - snow in Denver, but eventually we did get home. Time to unpack, do laundry, repack, and get ready for the next adventure!

Colorado Master/slave Contest

About one week after we came back to Denver with the ITPC titles, I attended the Denver Danse of Life. It's a hook pull event with live drumming held in sacred space - bliss.
Afterward, one of the organizers, Master Trent, asked if I'd consider serving on the judging panel of the Colorado Master/slave Contest he was organizing. I looked at him and cocked my head. "You know how I feel about that track, right? I don't really get it." Yes, he knows. We've had many discussions before. He asked me to bring my Leather viewpoint to the panel and contribute that way. I agreed.

Friday night, March 29th, we met at the Denver Eagle for the introductory Meet & Greet with the contestants, judges, and general public. There were two contestant pairs, and both represented well. I sent a "mystery person" who was not dressed very leather-y to visit with the contestant pairs and report back to me later, and I made sure to spend some time visiting with each pair as well. It was a fun night and the turnout was great.

Saturday the 30th rolled around, and the judges and contestant sat down for Interviews at 2pm. That is always an interesting dance, and this one was open to the public. I was honored to sit on a panel of highly respectable judges from the local community, and I learned a great deal from them over the weekend. The interviews were fun, spirited, and intense. Afterwards, we broke for a snack/meal, and returned at 5 to begin the contest. When it was all done, Lady Marquetta and Slave Leonis carried the patches home with them and will represent their community for the next year. We all wish them the best.

While I don't "get" the entire Master/slave dynamic, I'm always learning more. This weekend exposed me to people who are willing to educate and share their lifestyle in a very public way. I appreciate their dedication and thoughtful discussions. They listened to me as I expressed some of my perceptions and opinions based on personal interactions; we laughed about some really funny bad examples of how NOT to approach this lifestyle, and they opened up their hearts to me so I could better understand a dynamic I haven't yet grasped. I am grateful and blessed. Thank you all.

Take Your Clothes Off!

I'm an introvert - I like my quiet time. I don't do well with small talk - the concept eludes me. And I still manage to have fun and enjoy the crazy busy noisy chaos that is International Mr Leather (and sometimes Mid-Atlantic Leather). How? By having a purpose, a reason, and a direction for conversation. Most of the year, I sit in an office with a computer, doing non-social activities to fund the adventure that is my life. But once or twice a year, I leave the computer behind and become a retail salesperson for one of my dearest friends. Carlos is the designer and tailor of CJ's Leather. He creates the designs and patterns, orders the hides, and makes the garments. What you see in his shop is the work of his hands. It is quality, made in America by a local business that supports his community in more ways than I can count. And when I'm in his shop, the crowds disappear into a dull roar in the background and the only thing that matters is the customers that come in to shop. Here is where I feel safe. I am with my friends. I care about what I'm doing. I want people to look good, to feel sexy, and to enjoy their purchase. In this shop, I have a reason to talk to people, to connect, to ask what they're looking for and help them find the right fit. Every year at IML, I get to dress someone in leather for the first time. They find themselves looking in a mirror and seeing, for the first time, a new sexy image that fills them with confidence. That's an amazing experience to share.
The crowds ebb and flow, there are times we cannot slow down to eat lunch, and there are strange moments of stillness in the middle of the afternoon where we check the racks and try to clean up the shop area, and in those moments, I find the peace that keeps me sane.
And then there are the perks...in order to put the leather on, their clothes must come off. Some men are shy, others are NOT so shy. Some will use the dressing room, and others just shuck their clothes right there. Do I appreciate a beautiful body? Oh yes. Can I remain professional and deal with finding them the right garment? Yes. But I do enjoy it? Oh hell yes.
Customer: I'd like to try on this armband.
Staff: Take your clothes off!
Customer: But it's just an armband...
Staff: Yes it is, but you're going to want to try on everything in the shop, and this just makes it easier for everyone.
Customer: If you say so....
And they do it. And, in most cases, they do want to try on a shirt, a pair of pants, a vest, chaps, a harness, and we help them find the right fit and design for their body. Then everybody's happy. But I am in Denver for 51 weeks out of the year. When I say "Take your clothes off!" they just look at me and walk away. That's the magic of IML - for four days out of the year, they do it!

MAL 2013 part 3

Eastern Standard time, you are not my friend. Getting up at 7am in DC means it's 5am for my Mountain Standard time body. But we did it so we could shower and make it to breakfast with the other International Titleholders at 8am. Nick was there, and so was Axel; Luckey and I made four. This was a fantastic time to visit and get better acquainted. In the busyness of the PR job that is titleholding, you may share an honor with several others, but not really know them. That's why this meal was important. So we started off Sunday with a couple of fantastic men, just getting to know each other and building the bonds of friendship.
Then it was naptime - these long days were catching up with me and Luckey. Robert had to leave and catch a plane when we got up, so the two of us crashed for an hour until it was my time to head back to CJ's to help out at 11. The Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather title contest started at 1,so Luckey got a longer nap than I did. We headed into the ballroom for the contest and settled in for the next few hours. The Centaur Motorcycle Club hosts the weekend, and this is the annual installation of new officers. They are a dedicated group of men, working hard to put on a large annual event. They have my thanks for all their efforts. There were only three contestants this year for the title, and I was a little surprised at the number - in the past there have been eight or more contestants. But that didn't mean the judges had an easy job. All three men had an excellent stage presence and handled themselves well. Ultimately, the title was awarded to Bryce Caine, and then it was time for lots of pictures.
The vendor mart closed at 5, and it was time to get back to work. A small team of dedicated workers disassembled the CJ's Leather booth and packed it for load-out. We were the first ones out to the loading dock. Ultimately, the truck was loaded and locked at 6:15 and we all breathed a sigh of relief. In the meantime, while we were waiting for Carlos to bring the truck from the parking lot, we pitched in and helped pack up the neighboring shop, Le Chateau Exotique, in record time as well.
8pm brought us to the DC Coast with friends. We enjoyed the evening's meal, but the richness upset Luckey's stomach a bit, so he headed back to the hotel early. We closed out the restaurant, chatting with the staff and celebrating friendships old and new. While the host hotel was emptying out, there was still a lot of cruising to be found. I found my bed and crashed with Luckey and that was a night.

MAL 2013 part 2

Saturday was going to be exciting - puppy mosh day! We got up and moving around 9am, a little more slowly after two very full and busy days, and started on our third. After breakfast, Luckey and Robert went roaming aroud the hotel and socializing and I spent a few hours working in CJ's Leather. Time flew, and it was off to the pit! We'd contacted the Mid Atlantic Kennel Klub earlier to alert them to Luckey's honey allergy and offer to bring gummy bears, so there was very low concern about treats. At the mosh area, we met Slavepup Axel, and decided to talk about title stuff later after the playtime! And away they went - mosh mosh mosh sniff push wiggle scratch rub bark howl mosh mosh mosh. Luckey met his match in Pup Tank, the first pup to square off with Luckey and flip him in a puppy bulldozing match. Luckey's eyes went HUGE. All the hard playing pups wore themselves out in the first hour, and dragged themselves off to the edges of the moshpit area to chat and get acquainted. All the smaller, less rowdy pups kept playing for the full two and a half hours, and I stayed busy throwing balls, rubbing bellies, and scritching ears. This was a blast! Post mosh, Luckey went to get cleaned up and patch up his knees and elbows, and I went back to work for a few more hours at CJ's until it was time to get changed and dress up.
Leather Cocktails is where you put on your shiny best dressy leathers and socialize, drink, and snack in the company of your shiny dressed up friends for a few hours. There's always some beautiful leathers on display, and lots of hot men as well. Good discussions, networking, and hanging with the extended family is a great way to spend a few hours anywhere you go. They wrapped up with a Parade of Colors to pay respect to the various clubs that traveled to support the event. Then it was back to the market, the lobby, the bar to shop, cruise, and drink. I sat in the restaurant at dinner with some long-time friends catching up on our lives while Luckey and Robert made several forays out into the crowd and hotel, always coming back to check in every hour or so. We also made plans to visit the DC Coast for dinner on Sunday night after things slowed down. This is a favorite dinner spot for several of us, and while the food is stunning, the service is stellar, so I was excited to take Luckey to one of my favorite spots in DC. Bedtime came early (sort of) because we had Titleholder Breakfast at 8am on Sunday.

Contest Prep

Last night I was honored to join a panel of local Leatherfolk to help prepare our local contestants for the regional Master/slave competition. We started with a mock interview session, where the four of us seated on a judging panel took turns asking them questions. We stumped them a few times, and got to dig a little deeper into their application paperwork. Next they gave a 10 minute joint presentation and then fielded questions from the 16+ people in the audience, and the judges did not ask anything this time. Then came each of their two minute speeches, followed by a volley of pop questions submitted in writing by everyone in the room. Those questions turned out to be more serious than funny, and mine did not get pulled from the hat to answer. Kinda bummed, because I wanted to see what kind of three-way scene they would concoct with JarJar Binks or William Shatner. Everyone filled out evaluation sheets through the night, and handed those in for constructive feedback. After 2.5 hours, most everyone left, and the “judges” were left with the contestants to review the evening for another half hour.

I really enjoyed the time we spent and I feel like I know them better. Did they do well? They did a great job. Were they perfect? Nope. Can they improve? Yes. I believe they will take the verbal feedback we provided, along with the stack of written evaluations and find ways to improve their overall presentation. Thanks, Master Trent, for inviting me to participate!

MIR 2012

The contest for the next Mr. International Rubber followed close on the heels of American Brotherhood Weekend, and we were back in Chicago once again.
I always enjoy Chicago, and try to get out and explore a little more each time I go. This trip was a bit odd, though. I spent the weekend feeling...disconnected. It wasn't the wonderful people we saw and spent time with, and it wasn't the fun event and vendor market. It was something in me that just wouldn't "click" and let me relax and enjoy myself.
Yes, I had fun. The annual date with my fisting friend was a rocking good time. (I do not have beginner-sized hands.) The meals, the friends, the atmosphere - all were good. But....meh.
I know that I enjoy rubber, but at the same time, I am not a "rubber man". I enjoy the feel of my surf suit from E7, and I love the gloves, boots, gas masks, skin tight fun. But not that weekend. Most often, it felt like I'd rather be home and in my own space and away from everyone. I do not enjoy that feeling. Was I getting sick, or getting over being sick? nope. My body was there, my goal was to be present and have fun, and my head/emotions were completely against it. I've been back over the emotional landscape of the weekend many times, but I have no answers. Sometimes, you just don't click. Here's to hoping that doesn't happen again soon.

ABW 2012

American Brotherhood Weekend is one of my favorite events of the year. I always explain it as the family reunion where all the cool aunts and uncles and cousins show up for a great party. In this case, aunts and uncles and cousins translates into People Who Work In Their Communities. This wonderful group of people are active, contributing members of their own local leather communities and they are happy to share their experiences. What works, what doesn't work, pitfalls, new ideas - these people are full of information and they are happy to share. And they all come together to support this weekend that selects three titleholders - American LeatherMan, American LeatherWoman, and American Leatherboy - the American Leather Family.

Yep, I'm biased. My boy holds the American Leatherboy 2008 title, and he had a great year working and traveling with Randy Carmenaty and Joan Norry. This is my extended family, and I love them.

So I was excited to get to take the puppy along with us to Chicago for ABW 2012 and introduce him to our extended family there. Bonus points that we both got to show up with shiny new titles. Chris and I had booked our airline flights months in advance (got to plan ahead!) and we were able to find Luckey a last minute deal on airfare that was even better than ours. (score!)

Thursday night was the Contestant/Judge/Family night at Dean's home, and the hospitality was flawless, as always. Food, drinks, friendships new and old, introductions, and catching up - all the ingredients for a fun night.

Friday I did some touring around Chicago with Luckey and Chris joined us after lunch for a boat tour of the architecture and the lake. I thought I was going to freeze out on the water. Later came dinner at Frontera Grill and back to the hotel where the last member of our weekend pack joined us, our friend Pup Dino. (I know you probably read that as Dee-noe, but he says it's Die-noe, because he likes Dinosaurs!) Together we made the trek to Touche' for the Meet & Greet to officially start the weekend. Lots of fun there!

Saturday afternoons brought us to the Leather Archives & Museum for the contest. The judges certainly had their work cut out for them - the contestants were strong and very qualified.

Saturday night was out in Boystown to meet local friends and hang out at the CellBlock, and Luckey got his 'hawk cleaned up by local barber Fluffy (the kitty) in the Bondage Barber Chair. There was rope, drinks, making out, and general fun all around.

Sunday at the LA&M finished out the contest, Luckey and I got to speak for a few minutes about our contest, and then the new titleholders were announced! Congrats to Jeff and Doc, and Tyler agreed to represent for another year as Leatherboy. There was much happiness and picture taking. Then we set off to SideTrack after the Victory Party at Touche for the winners. Eventually, most everyone wound up at SideTrack too. Purple Squishie Drinks! Yes, they are really called Ketel One Krush, but many years ago, I drank many many of them and named them Purple Squishies! (that's another story) Luckey found that the Red Squishy drinks were more to his taste.

Luckey headed back to Denver on Monday; Dino left early on Tuesday; Chris and I flew home to Denver on Tuesday night. Everybody had a great time and we started planning our return trip to MIR.
Overall, I counted the trip a great success. We had fun and Luckey got to meet our extended Chicago family, plus all the cool aunts and uncles and cousins in our ABW family.

All journeys begin with the first step

Hi there.
Here's a brief intro to who I am and why I'm here now.
My name is Don, I'm 46, and I am a Leatherman. My boy and my pup call me Daddy, but I don't expect anybody else to do that unless we're close.
My boy is boy chris, and we are in our 9th year together. My pup is Pup Luckey and we are in our 4th year together. I love them dearly.

In September 2012, Pup Luckey and I traveled to Tulsa, OK, to compete in the newly renewed International Puppy and Trainer Contest. It was a fantastic experience, and we won the titles.

So, for the next year, we'll be traveling, educating, visiting, and sharing the FUN of human puppy interactions with our kinky family. Part of the education will happen here - I'll share some of my thoughts and ideas about human puppy/trainer interactions, and we'll have other opportunities to share at the events we visit through the year.

That's a wrap for the first post, and I'll be back soon!